Welcome to "Emotional Overwhelm": first post in a series of Three on the phases of awakening as I am/have experiencing them.
When our soul stirs within and the newly awakened energy begins its expansion, it seems to wreck havoc in our “perfect” reality and all sorts of feelings and emotions rise to the surface.
The safety mechanism we have used for years: restraining from our intuition, holding back from expressing our feelings, especially anger and displeasure, no longer works. Something is stirring deep inside, pushing all sorts of emotions to the surface and there is nothing that we can do to stop it.
It is like trying to hold a cork under water, the moment you let go, it comes back up to the surface. The part of us that tries to suppress and hide is the ego. A fear based consciousness that controls our very actions and thoughts.
Honestly – that is all we know. This is how we grew up, were taught, and what is familiar. We mistake recognition for love, achieve power through competition and exercise control in our exchanges with others. We don’t know how to choose love in a world that creates from fear.
Of course, we are not aware of this, that is, until we begin to feel the light within.
From that point on we will realize that we have foregone our very own nature – our own standards – and lived life based on other people’s criterion instead of following our own needs. We have forgotten who we are and why we came here.
So we set ourselves reminders along the way to come into remembrance and the journey begins. Our awakening begins when the seed of light that resides in our higher heart is activated.
Once that speck of light is triggered it wants to expand and when it does, all that is not aligned with this higher vibration within us is going to be brought to your awareness to be embraced and released.
In order to hold those higher frequencies of light, our human vessel will have to re-calibrate to accommodate this new energy and our mind will have to expand as well to accommodate the multi-dimensionality of your soul.
This is what we call the transition from Ego consciousness to Heart consciousness and it occurs through a series of vibrational shifts. It is often referred to as ascension, return to Christ Consciousness, etc…
When these higher frequencies of light begin to stir within, we start to question everything in our lives. Things that were important to us no longer seem to matter and we begin to feel empty.
We struggle to understand what is taking place and our mind spins in disbelief questioning the validity of our feelings.
Before we know it, we are inundated with all sorts of feelings, most of which seem to come out of the blue.
It is not uncommon during this time to feel:
Because when we begin to dis-engage from the ego, our inner pain is exposed!
Our inner pain is the truth we have been hiding from ourselves.
For me it was the realization that I was no longer happy in my marriage, that I was not doing what I loved, that I was not aligned with the friends I had chosen, I was ignoring my finances and much more…
This led to a complete emotional overwhelm. I felt engulfed in a war with myself.
Little did I know I was now engaging in the battle with my Ego.
Feelings would sprout – out of nowhere – like pop tarts jumping out of a toaster (I have never eaten those by the way but I remember the commercial and this is the first thing that came to my mind writing this – lol)
My mind was spinning in disbelief, my ego kept questioning the emergence of this new energy and I kept mistrusting the validity of my feelings!
Oh I knew deep inside how I felt, but admitting and accepting my true feelings meant changing my reality as it was. And nope, I was not going to do it. I was going to stuff it all.
I began to resist – Oh, don’t do this because you will be giving this energy more momentum – except I did not know this at the time.
No matter how painful, a beautiful process of transition is taking place.
You are giving your soul a voice!
All that you have been hiding from yourself (what your human has been suppressing/repressing) ie: the marriage that no longer works, the job that you hate… - you are no longer able to hide these feelings from yourself.
Your soul is saying enough – why have you foregone me?
Energetically you are starting to dis-engage from the ego and it is not going to let you do that without a fight. When our ego takes charge, our actions are based on fear. We do things and make decision to stay in control.
Those decisions are based on outer standards rather than following our own needs. The moment we begin to dis-engage from the ego we reach deep within and our soul reminds us what our true needs are.
Your emotions are key because they are the entrance to your greater self
This means that you access the true you, the authentic you, the non-physical part of you that wants to express itself in this reality through your emotions.
Had I known this was the case, I would have avoided spirals of pain. You see, many of us begin to judge what comes up and this is when the pain kicks in, the real emotional pain, the part where we cry snort and tears hoping someone is going to show up and take the pain away from us.
The pain is enhanced by self judgement
Judging our pain makes it worse. It makes us small and powerless. Judging self brings more and more pain. All the time.
I want to give you another perspective on pain. From now on, when you feel pain imagine that it is your soul rising to the light. It is your soul expanding through the illusion. Know that although it does not feel good, you are moving towards the light.
Be willing to accept the pain
If you want to shift and overcome the emotional roller coaster, you have to be willing to accept the pain. There is no other way around it and trust me when you do you will experience the biggest transformation!
Accepting that this is the process takes time. Be gentle to yourself, be kind to your human and embrace you when something arises that makes you want to crawl in a hole. Remember that this energy is doing its work, it is moving through you, it wants to be seen, recognized, acknowledged and embraced before it can leave your field.
You are not alone.
But if you are struggling to deal with the emotions that are surfacing and do not know how to move forward, I have put together an mp3 for you, so that you can learn to overcome your emotions step by step.
Click here to access it
Much love to you